This is a support Blog for those who are experiencing difficulty moving through resistances as they Blog and Vlog in general or specifically within the DesteniIProcess. If you find that your mind as ‘BackChat’ is constantly telling you through thoughts, feelings or pictures that you are not changing, not ‘feeling’ better, not moving or that you are not experiencing yourself differently – then here are some basic guidelines to identify whether you are in a point of self-doubt as self-sabotage or if the points you are self forgiving require further direction as a point of specific self-correction. The point of the entire process is for us to apply ourselves within the material and to document our day to day experiences and any realisations we have.
If one for example starts doubting whether you should be in the DesteniIProcess due to you not changing – then the point here is that you are not questioning whether you should be a part of the DIP - however you 'feel' that your blogs and vlogs are ineffective because you are not experiencing any change because you are fearing actual letting go and changing. This fear as you are able to see for yourself is not real - it is an accepted role you have taken on in your life due to who you are with and who and what you fear losing if you change. You might find that you don't feel you are effectively moving through the points because you are dependent on someone in a relationship. The Mind will tell you through ‘BackChat’ that you or your blog/vlogs are ‘not good enough’ or that ‘the process does not work’ – however what is really happening is that you are actually not willing to change as you are dependent on and have accepted yourself as you are due to survival linked to ego, money or a point of self-acceptance existent currently within your world. The hardest part I found when faced with letting go of my past definitions of ‘not being good enough and being stupid’ so that I could accept me – was actually... letting go of the self-definition of ‘not being good enough and feeling stupid’. Therefore for our self forgiveness to be effective we have to make the decision to let go of those self definitions within realising they are not who we are and are not what is best for all/ourselves. If you do not yet see Self within this ‘Equality Equation’ then your self-forgiveness is useless. So I suggest the following:
Make a list of all the points you have been working on over the last few months. Then next to each point you write down where within the point have you not been able to stop and self forgive. Then you write down why you have not let go and forgiven and self corrected. Here you will start observing an interesting point - where you are holding onto points/the past because you are in conflict with your current role as you have accepted it within your world. Then the next step is to observe: is direct change as self correction required to change a pattern or does a pattern simply require daily writing as support - such as:
I Accept me
I Am here
I stop limiting myself
I love me
I Support me
I Direct me in all situations as what is best for me, as that which is best for all
I stop Self definition according to people/things and events outside of me, I stand here the same always as Self-Acceptance in Self Support.
These self corrective statements - which you could call ‘affirmation’s I have had to speak and write at some stage daily for months - as a point of re-programming. This information is specifically in relation to self-definitions you are de and re programming within yourself. The other patterns where you actually have to stop participating in your world such as:
allowing abusive conversations
allowing abusive relationships
compromising around people and places
- these environment/people specific patterns you will only change by stopping and not participating – which becomes part of your common sense development. This is your personal process because only you in your self-honesty will be able to make the decisions necessary to stop accepting and allowing (self) abusive patterns within your world.
First observe the above mentioned points and perhaps this can become something you can do short blogs or vlogs about. A suggestion - take it slow - take one point you observe and vlog or blog about it - breathe and do the next vlog when you are ready to apply the next point such as breaking a pattern through non participation/breathing. Then this allows you to make a few Vlogs because one pattern will consist of many environmental factors/triggers points/memories/feelings/thoughts/physical behaviors. Explore one pattern to its fullest and go as deep as you see. Each Vlog can for example be about one point within a pattern:
1. Abusive friendships: The words spoken
2. Abusive friendships: What my friends represent about me
3. Abusive friendships: How I created the friendship as a pattern from my childhood
4. Abusive friendships: When I allow anger within friendships
5. Abusive friendships: Self Forgiveness
6. Abusive friendships: Self Correction and Self-responsibility
Remember not to use people's names -the vlogs are an overview of your experience within the pattern. By you slowing the entire point down and opening a point up you are showing others how to do it.